Good things come to those who wait, don’t they? Monday 22 June, Day 96!

My head is in a spin, my feet don’t touch the ground!

Pure, dead brilliant man, even though my hairdresser is not opening for a while yet (fingers, toes, legs all crossed) she is booking in appointments, I told her to slot me in for whenever, I don’t care when it is, but I can guarantee I’ll be there, like a butchers dog slabbering and licking the windows.

See even if I am in a meeting with my works chief executive, I’ll be attending the meeting from the salon chair, and if the CE is no happy, they can get tae France, take it up with my line manager.

I cannot wait just to be able to wash and go, see this wash, brush, blow then go it’s fucking exhausting. I’m confident when I get my hair cut, I’ll go back to my post COVID weight.

Even better news was that Nicola announced that single person households will be able to form extended groups with one other household. At first, I wasn’t sure what she meant about extended groups, but they clarified this when they replied to my email. “Dear Malky, yes you can have a ménage a twa, as long as two participants are from the same household. Now I’m no saying I’d be up for that, but felt I needed the clarification just in case.

On Friday night I msg Tam Hughes, “I’ve made some fresh crumpets, can you bring your jam over to make them extra special 😉. Five hours later still no reply, well I was fucking spitting feathers when I saw the sleekit wee bastard tip toeing out of Mary Andersons house at midnight.

Saturday morning, he replied, “just made a fresh batch of Jam, be over soon” Honestly what a total prick did he honestly think I’d let him have some of my crumpet a few hours after he had a roll n sausage with Mary!

I bet the reek of L’air du tramp was still lingering on his skin….. I msg him back “go and dunk yerself in Faye’s sheep dip and get up here asap.