Don’t you forget about me, Friday 12 June 2020, Day 86

It’s what you wear from ear to ear and not from head to toe, that matters!

I recognised this week, I’m in danger of getting stuck in a rut, I have no idea where my motivation has gone. I haven’t done Joe Wicks since I jumped up from a burpee fell forward and hit my head off the table and that was at least three weeks ago!

My concentration span is sitting around the ten second mark. I read a book last weekend and have no idea what it’s about. My brain has turned to complete and utter mush, when working I’m looking at my to do list and thinking, canny be bothered with that one, rather than just getting stuck in.

I was looking at notes I had taken at a meeting the week before and I had written “speak to Liz about getting approval for additional budget for eggs, milk, noodles, batteries” I am not sure she would authorise that and I have no idea what the additional budget was for.

Even out with work my heid is total and utter mince, one of my teammates is great at sending jokes and funny pics, he sent one on Wednesday and it took me about 25 mins of looking at it to get what it was. WTF is that about I am normally one of the first to reply!

At the beginning of May, I could just see my toes peeping from under my belly, well they’ve fucked off, no doubt to the market with my motivation. My attire these days consists of at home threadbare leggings and going out less threadbare leggings, the other day I was behind a woman in Lidl and I could see her white pants through her black leggings, and I thought “have you no pride”.

Well you should have seen the fucking state of me, I looked like I had raided my washing basket and shoved it on, oh in fact that is exactly what I had done, and my top was inside out! Why did I do that it’s not as if I don’t have loads of clean clothes, I haven’t used my iron in 87 days.

What’s even worse is I must have looked more depressed that Catherine Calderwood. Some old guy said to me “cheer up hen, it could be worse we could be in a pandemic”. I did want to punch his lights out, but he was right.

At the start of lockdown, it was such an unknown about what was going to happen, and like everyone else I rode the storm and kept thinking ach won’t be long before things are back to normal, I can be quite naive at times.

Now everyone’s talking about the new norm and I don’t like it one bit, but I realised if I didn't accept it, give myself a boot up the arse, set myself some goals and targets I’ll be left behind.

You know when I accepted it, I actually smiled at myself and I felt pure magic.