Belters Bar Part One, Wednesday 15 July 2020, Day 119

The hair’s coming off tomorrow, so I got to hang on till tomorrow, come what may, tomorrow, tomorrow, I’ll love me tomorrow, it’s only a day away.

I pure canny wait till tomorrow if I thought I would sleep I’d be in bed by 7.00pm, not only am I getting my hair cut but I am going to Belters bar to meet the Belters. The Belters (our pack name) are my pals and we’ve been hanging out for twenty-five years. We’ve been there, bought, wore, sold and stripped off the t-shirt.

The great thing about our friendship is that we are now at that age when absolutely fuck all is embarrassing anymore, fell in public, £2 in yer bank, pished yerself, fell asleep in the sun and melted a mars bar on yer bikini bottoms, got the clap, hilarious!!! Just as well since I’ve recently developed a farting habit.

During lockdown one of the lassies, built Belters bar in her garden, belters bar towels the lot and finally tomorrow, while being mindful of social distancing of course! “The Belters” are meeting up there for a wee swallie, well a big swallie!

In twenty-five years, the most we haven’t seen each other is a few days, (it helps we all work in the same place), so that’s nearly 121 days of catching up to do, I reckon tomorrow will be a mixture of tears, snotters, chants of who let the dogs out and just pure fucking carnage.

We’re meeting around 2.00pm so my plan is to be sensible and pace myself, but the likelihood of that happening is utter pish so I’m taking these with me.

Pre-printed card with my name, tel no and address

Extra Large Tena Ladies

Change of Clothes

Antibacterial Wipes

Four poly bags inserted inside each other (in case I vomit in taxi going home)

Spare Face Masks (in case I vomit in face mask)

£75.00 cash (potential taxi cleaning costs)

A big fucking smile

Here we, here we, here we fucking go……….